12. You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. When you ask how this process works, the wizard points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stranger. The wizard says, "I will now make them a dollar more attractive." He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But--somehow--this person is suddenly a little more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can't deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though--you can only pay him once. You can't keep giving him money until you're satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front.
How much cash do you give the wizard?
11 comments:
a) Not very.
b) I give the wizard as much money as I can scratch up. This is a pretty amazing opportunity and to be perfectly honest, I would like to see the effects of something like two thousand dollars more attractive if one dollar is a noticable effect. I feel like after two grand, I could be as sexy as Ashwin or something.
It's definitely one of those situations where the effect would asymptote, so it really depends where on the attractiveness-increasing curve you fall, and per dollar, what the slope of the change you'd be experiencing is.
If you're on a part of the curve where the slope is high, per dollar, your effect is going to be great. If you're already near an asymptote, each dollar will not have much effect.
So the question is, just how much money brings you close to the asymptote... you want to hit that. Personally, a bigger beard is about all I can think of that would make me sexier, and I'm already working on that, so I'm undoubtably near the asymptote. I'd give him a couple hundred bucks (what I'd waste on a girlfriend anyway), to make sure I get a damn sexy man's beard and maybe a foreign accent, and I'd be sated. Thoughts?
Haha, Anthony, that's definitely the dorkiest answer I could have imagined.
You've gotta figure, this is an investment in the future. If I spent 5 grand now, I could get a modelling contract for 10 grand. Or, somewhat less ridiculously, you're far more likely to be hired for a job if you're attractive. I wouldn't worry about the money right now, because I'd just convince myself that I'd make it back in the future because of hte investment. So I'd probably drop a G or so, see what happened.
I'm also not sure if I could live with all of you dropping a few grand on the wizard, and me being left behind by not spending much. Could I deal with all of you becoming gorgeous and still feel comfortable with myself? That could be really tough
Initially, I thought I'd drop absolutely as much as I could spare without crippling my savings. It sounded like a sweet deal and its not like I'm doing that much with that money now. Think 5 to 10 grand.
Then I thought: do I really want to be that attractive? If one dollar is a noticeable effect, imagine what that kind of money would do. I'd have to fend them off with a stick. Or maybe a cattle prod. Hot chicks, Ug-os, probably dudes, too. Imagine the struggle to maintain a decent relationship or marriage, given the constant temptation of people throwing themselves at you right and left. I mean, I'd be hot enough that she'd probably stick with me, but there would be hellish fights and a lot of guilt. (Yes, even I have a conscience.) I'd probably have a gaggle of my own stalkers, too. Plus, it would only be a matter of time before the paparazzi found me--you can get famous for just about anything these days.
Given all this, my pay range drops dramatically. I would probably give him at least 200--since I've gone on some dates that have cost me around 150, I figure I should be willing to pay at least that much. It's just sound financial thinking. My new upper limit would be 2 grand, and I would have to get a friend to pay something in that range and observe how it went. Hey, the rule was that I could only pay once. No one ever put a limit on how many other customers I could observe before making my decision.
Will: If you're the kind of guy who spends $150 on a date, you don't need to be any more attractive. If you treat girls that well, you should be just fine.
You know, you might think that, but with all due respect to your recent Vegas plans, I'm not all that interested in the kind of girls you can buy, however indirectly.
I also wasn't saying that sort of spending is a habit, but I've done it enough that it makes a good lower limit.
Finally, if we compare your assertions against my dismal track record, I think you'll find that your assumptions are patently false.
Oh, and its your throw.
--Will
I hear you Will. I've gone on enough dates that fall in the $150-250 range that I have be comfortable spending that on something else.
You know what though? The girls that expect that treatment don't seem to appreciate it, and the ones that probably would appreciate it wouldn't choose to spend the money that way anyway.
Btw, it's your throw
You know, I was hoping that I could give the wizard enough money to become as attractive as Will or Anthony. And now they get to spend money too? Hopefully these diminishing returns are real.
On another note... I don't know if I care how much it actually works. A street-walking wizard in downtown Chicago...? I'm confused.
right now i'd give all of my savings to the wizard so he could make me super hot so i could marry a rich man, refuse to sign a prenup because, well, we're "in love," then divorce his ass, repeat that like 2-3 more times, and then move to the italian countryside and shack up with a sexy italian man...of course we wouldn't be having sex ALL the time...we'd also have picnics, and we'd frequent Venice and other lovely Italian cities so he could buy me all the gucci and dior and chanel that my heart desired...my sexy italian man would also be a world-class chef of course, because, well i'm hot right? and he'd make the most delicious pastas and pizzas loaded with lots and lots of carbs (the way i see it, even if i gain weight, i'd still be super hot so no worries there), and i'd die a fat, hot, and satisfied woman.
or i could save my money for med school
you guys have spent 150-250 dollars on a single date before? that is ridiculous, there is no way i would accept that.. chivalrous and well-intentioned, yes. practical and necessary, hell no!
but u guys are sweet.
and yeah, id drop some money-- its kinda hard for women tho, cuz you are expected to be beautiful and perfect, butttt if you are too pretty than you aren't taken seriously. being that it is impossible to hit that balance, id just spend what i make interning this summer (they are going to "try" and find me a stipend) and see what happens.
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